a blog about nothing...

Saturday, October 21, 2006

This much I know

It's funny how things turn out in life sometimes. One moment you're on a magic carpet ride (hehe, yes I am thinking of Aladdin) and the next....BAM!!! That carpet has been yanked from under you so damn fast that you're left with not only a bad case of whiplash but also wondering if that carpet really was the ride you should've been on in the first place...maybe it was like one of those dodgy Royal Show rides where you get cheap thrills for a max of 30s after paying an hour's worth of wages followed by what feels like a lifetime of nausea and repeated claims of "I'm NEVER doing that again" in between brief periods of hurling the remains of your fairy floss or your dagwood dogs.

Why the random thought? I have realised that I am the Agony Aunt of all my relatives and close friends. People who I have close relationships with seem to turn to me when they have problems with their relationships or life in general. I am quite baffled as to why they would since when it comes to both, it would seem that I am as clueless as a weather man trying to forecast the Melbourne weather report for the following day, let alone the upcoming week. At least, it is quite obvious to me anyways.
Most of their problems seem to involve relationships and these fall under 2 extremes. One is that they are with fuckwit boyfriends from the very beginning which means that I, as their good friend, am obligated to listen to every little fight they've ever had with the patience of a meditating monk. But there's no talking sense into these people. They are in love and what I've noticed is that you can never talk a person out of being in love just as you can never explain the feeling to a person who hasn't been in love. At the other end of the scale, I have those friends who have started with a fairytale beginning beginning followed by an absolute bombshell. Something that has come from soooo far left field that you react like a possum in headlights...frozen, eyes wide open and wondering what the fuck happened and where did it fall apart. And what I've noticed is that regardless of who the person is, love can make even the strongest, most hard headed person become a stack of cards...the framework is there but it's ready to collapse at any second...and it usually does. The classic questions of "why me?" and "what's wrong with me?" inevitably rear their fugly heads. For my part, the conversations always end with "trust me when I say that everything will be fine". Their response? A very angry, practically spitting reply of "You. Don't. Fucking. Know. That." But the thing is, don't ask me how or why, but I do know. Because everything, evenutally always IS fine. You deal with whatever curveballs life seems to pelt in your direction and after periods of broken bones (or in this case, broken hearts) you come out generally unscathed. And I guess in these times when u feel so low that it makes u question and doubt urself, u need ur friends to help pick u up. Which brings me back to the start. Love (and life) is like that rollercoaster ride at the show. Full of ups and downs, twists and bends that initially have u feeling like u're on top of the world, followed by periods of nausea and black outs, and then after u've had time to settle down and recuperate before u know it u're bak to ur old self again. And after swearing that you'll never get urself into that mess ever again, the next time the show comes around, in spite of urself, u find u're on that ride again.
My final thought: is it better to have loved and lost than to not have loved at all??