Life's a bitch...and don't we know it

Seriously, why oh why does it always seem that when an important weekend is coming up and you want to look your best, your skin suddenly has a fucking brain fart?? And it ain't just one, it's a whole damn cluster of them! It's like my skin has a 6th sense of these things..."quick, she's going away this weekend, CODE RED!!!" And then they all swoop in for the kill, like when you feed seagulls at the beach (those of you who were stupid enough to do that know what I'm talking about...damn scary man!) It didn't happen last week when all I had was uni, no no, it had to happen this weekend when I'm going away for my first holiday in 3 years. I did everything right: drank heaps (and heaps) of water (which just made me pee like a race horse), put on facial masks (which seemed to make it worse), ate healty (which made me feel worse), spend oodles and oodles of money buying expensive brands that are supposed to be antiblemish (false advertising dammit!) You name it, I did it. And this is how the bastid repays me. By thinking it's a free party where everyone's invited: come one, come all!

Remedies that I've tried:
1. squeezing lemon juice on them *hint: this burns like mad people and does NOT come highly recommended. Particularly stings when it comes in contact with the eyes
2. leaving them alone. This is actually harder than it sounds cos when you have a huge MOFO that's the size of Mt Everest, it's like an itch that needs scratching
3. sqeezing them. DON'T DO THIS!!! While the one you squeezed may be gone, about another 10 more come to its funeral. Not pretty.
4. antiblemish sticks. HAHAHAHAH, this is a joke! They should just call them Bullshit sticks. However, I do learn my lesson the hard way cos I always go back for more! *PS I'm a product hussy <:-%
5. exfoliate. Some lucky bastid out there struck it rich when they bottled up sand in a tube and called it " exfoliating microbeads". Sure, and Mr Garrison from South Park doesn't look anything like Johnny Howard!
and finally...
6. toothpaste. Yes, as weird as it sounds, I have tried this. And while it does kinda get rid of it, I don't really know if walking around with white globs that look like a pigeon just #2d on your face is more attractive than the pimple itself. And yes, I did think about putting it on at night instead, however, toothpaste all over the pillow and subsequently in my hair (and everywhere except the damn spot itself) is not very appealing.

*sigh* I envy those damn bitches that don't spend a small fortune on facial products and still have peachy, flawless, smooth-as-a-baby's-bottom skin. Funnily enough, it always seems that they're smokers and chocolate addicts....hm, a diet worth trying me thinks ;-p